Tales from the Table

Hi, every now and again I come across a funny or memorable massage therapy story. I hope you enjoy! massage overland park – prairie village

Most memorable massage— or How I wrestled a Bear!

Some years back, on a business trip to Vancouver, I was stranded, due to a huge blizzard. With all but emergency travel banned, I settled into my hotel and found they offered “Turkish” massage. Being bored and looking for a new experience… I bit!
At the appointed hour, I reported to the spa and not a soul around, but did find a very unusual table, better described, an elevated platform, not unlike a boxing ring with no ropes.

Shortly, my man appeared, in sandals and a bathrobe, and asked me to disrobe… while handing me a cloth about the size and texture of a twin bed sized sheet… and I was totally baffled. Was this to lay on, drape around me?? No, he then opened his robe and I saw the purpose was… for me to wrap this around myself, much as a giant diaper.. with no safety pins. My masseuse was roughly 5′ 8” and would run around 290… I was 6’4” and 220… ,not looking good for me. However, the best part was BODY HAIR! In all my years of gym classes, sports, fraternity showers… this guy made a grizzly look bald!

With some coaching, I donned my new outfit, only to find we now were to crawl up on the platform… and somehow the thoughts of a Roman Coliseum death match whizzed through my head.

In addition, his massage oil was in an old wine bottle, right off the table of an Italian restaurant… little metal pouring spout and all…. kinda reminded me of a Danny DeVito on steroids. He then proceeds to heavily oil down his OWN body… and says I’ll get all I need as the treatment proceeds… As I stood there, staring at the wildly glistening super hairy man, in a giant diaper!

Note: We then “wrestled” for 45 minutes, as he put me in various holds, stretches, and positions. In turn, I promised a very big tip and the passwords to all my accounts, if he would just unwrap my leg from around my neck.. and let me go! Longest 45 minute of my life…

Lessons learned: Get to know your masseuse before the session begins.. and ask a few questions… read other patients comments… and never wear a diaper with no safety pins!

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